Grant Cyster comments on hope and disappointment

Grant Cyster

During a vacation a few years ago, I was about to fly out of the Chicago airport. I remember that day well. The weather matched my mood perfectly. It was a gloomy day. The sky was heavy and overcast. It was quite a depressing scene. My mood, was melancholic to say the least. I remember feeling quite discouraged and generally weighed down by circumstances at the time. The rain was beating against the window of the plane heavily as we accelerated towards takeoff. Within a couple of minutes we had entered the thick cloud bank and visibility dropped to practically zero. But then, suddenly, something unexpected occurred.

As the aircraft broke cloud cover, the scene changed from one of gloom, to one of dazzling brightness. The plane ascended above the clouds and the view before me was so bright that I was forced to shield my eyes. The light from the sun was being reflected off of the layer of clouds hundreds of feet below us...clouds sprawled out like a massive blanket of pure white cotton wool. The contrast between these two scenes that were merely a few short seconds apart was astounding. I sensed the whisper of my Heavenly Father, and the following truth found its way into my heart: Just because oppressive clouds are hiding the sun from view, does not mean that it isn't shining radiantly just the same. Just because its warmth is hindered by overcast skies, does not mean that the earth below is not benefiting from its life-giving rays.

I'm reminded of a scene from the movie, Matrix Revolutions. Neo and Trinity are making their way toward the machine city. In order to avoid a barrage of explosives being hurled toward them, Neo asks Trinity to steer the ship very high into the sky in order to dodge the attack. In the real world that they now found themselves battling in, neither of them had ever seen sunlight. In the war against the machines, it was believed that human beings had scorched the sky in an attempt to rob their enemy of their energy source in the sun. As Trinity steers the ship heavenward there is an exceedingly brief moment where the ship breaks cloud cover and she observes the beauty of sunlight for the first time. She is left practically speechless and can simply utter the word, "Beautiful". She just barely observes this breathtaking spectacle, when the ship begins to descend and they find themselves back in the war zone and again cloaked in darkness.

There are many times when life feels this way to me. The times when the pressure of painful and confusing circumstances seem completely stifling and suffocating. These are the times when trusting in God is much easier said than done. Faith seems fragile, and hope in a silver lining seems to dangle by a precariously thin thread. The writer of Proverbs speaks of how deferred hope makes the heart sick. When dreams and desires that are dear to us seem constantly sabotaged, it becomes increasingly difficult to hold out hope for anything pleasant. Like feeling sands of promise slip through our fingers, we tell ourselves that it is better to go through life expecting no good, than to indulge what seems like the ridiculous expectation of anything wonderful ever happening to us. At least when we expect nothing good, our hearts cannot be broken by the painful surprise of disappointment.

However, I cannot deny the fact that there have been unmistakable moments in the midst of life's storms when it feels like God himself has peeled back the clouds and granted me a glimpse of the grandeur that is eternally present. It could take the form of an inspiring song, or a captivating natural scene. It could occur as I do what I love and was gifted to do. It could happen as a result of any one of a number of different sources of inspiration. In these precious moments, I am reminded that I am a part of something that is far greater than myself. I am reminded of the undeniable work of God in my life and of what an honor and privilege it is to partner alongside him toward the fulfillment of his will on this earth. In these moments I am encouraged with the truth that God's goodness always shines upon me, even when I lose the ability or even the desire to recognize it. And as swiftly as this ray of hope touches my soul, the gloom of life's pressures comes rolling back in threatening to crush the encouragement I have just received.

I would do well to deliberately and repeatedly remind myself that the darkest and most ominous storm clouds can never thwart the Son-light that graciously sustains and nourishes me. He remains ever radiant.