Stephen Crosby comments

We're to be like our older brother, Jesus, who as Messiah exercised His discriminative faculties. His evaluations were just not based on the natural order, which include the mere application of acquired knowledge and the powers of the intellect. He didn't judge with the sight of the eyes or the hearing of the ears. (Isaiah 11:1 ff.; John 8, e.g.) He judged (made discriminative evaluations) especially for the oppressed or disenfranchised based on what He heard from His Father in relationship (John 5:30). That's a clue for us. Any virtue expressed outside of intimacy and relationship with the Lord is just death on a
silver platter.

Application: Grace and Truth

What makes this matter so difficult is in our application. We're not perfect as was our Lord. Skepticism, perfectionism, and rationalism are not kingdom virtues. It's so easy to let our biases, preferences, and irritations motivate us to unrighteous judgments. Any fool can tell when something may not be right. Being an incarnate remedy to what is wrong is another matter. Even in handling the Scriptures, we can do so from a spirit of death (2 Cor. 3:6). We can be correct in precept and wrong in spirit-the curse of fundamentalism of all kinds.

Many are quick with truth and short on love. Others are long on love and short on truth. Grace and truth are embodied in our Lord and should be in us. The problem is what's gracious and what isn't can be so subjective. Many life giving things may appear to be ungracious to people of scrupulous sensibilities and fragile psychology.

By their fruits you shall know them is fundamentally evaluative/discriminating (Matt. 7: 20). Generation or brood of vipers (Better translated: you illegitimate children of snakes-Mt. 12:34) is a categorizing, discriminative, judgment, as are "white washed tombs"(Mt. 23:27) and "you are of your father the devil" (John 8:44).

When Jesus was calling people these names, He wasn't failing the grace test. So whatever being gracious means, it can't be defined by our cultural sensitivities of what might hurt my feelings. Truth has a way of doing that: gently or ungently delivered.

However, in John 1:14-17 there are twice as many references to grace as there are to truth. That's a hint. As important as truth is, our apprehension of it will always be incomplete, and subject to biases and preferences that we think only the other guy's ministry has. No matter how "amazingly revelated" we consider ourselves or our favorite ministry, we all are now, and will be, wrong in our understanding of Scripture in some way or degree, at some time. Hence, the primacy of grace, and our need of one another.

I distrust anyone (including myself) who thinks they've got "it" or found "it" (whatever "it" may be). Only the Lord has "it." I'm a lifelong learner. Folks who think they've "got it" have nothing to learn and my existence is irrelevant to them. They don't relate to me as someone worthy of being known in personhood. I'm just a fresh download target for their perceived revelation of "it." For them, I'm not a human being or a brother. I'm a project in need of remediation, a potential convert to the ranks of the enlightened, from their perspective.

In our interpersonal relationships, those of us with a teaching-preaching-prophetic gift need to learn where the "off" switch is and keep it there frequently. The wisest person is often the one who has the least to say (Prov. 17:28). When His cross has made deep furrows in your soul, it's amazing how little one is compelled to speak. St. Ambrose said that whoever cannot be silent should never speak, because he will have nothing to say. The person who likely deserves a hearing the most is the one who requires it the least.

It's more important to be apprehended by Him who is Truth than to "stand for" and preach what we think is true. I believe in holding to Him tightly, and holding my understanding of Him (the Scriptures) loosely. The former is a sure foundation, the latter is open to frequent adjustment.

Undoubtedly everyone reading has, at one time or another, been abused or seriously hurt by inept, ungracious, and demeaning judgments from Christians. I'm sorry for your pain. I'm sorry for the pain I've caused.

However, all ineptness aside (including my own) the exercise of our evaluative faculties, empowered by the Spirit as a function of the new creation as discernment, is a normal, spiritual, legitimate, and protective function for all believers.

Method

How should legitimate judgment be exercised? We need to separate doctrines and practices from personal behavior and sin issues.